Rain, Rain, Go Away.

I don't know what it is about the rain, but no matter how good of a mood I'm in before the dreary weather hits, I seem to go into instant crabby-pants mode the second it gets icky out. I woke up this morning to the sound of pouring rain, and while many people find that to be relaxing, I find it to be rather depressing. I can't ever remember a time in my life when I actually wanted it to rain or enjoyed it when it happened. It just makes me an unhappy little camper. So, sunhine, if you're listening, please come back to me because I'm not enjoying this less-than-stellar mood I'm in! Kind of ironic because one of my favorite quotes is, "We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same, so the trick is in what we emphasize." For me being someone who's such a proponent of the idea that we are in control of our own attitude and mood, it seems a little silly that I blame the rain for making me hate the world sometimes. Oh well, everyone's allowed to have a bad day or two once in awhile, right?!

17 Again?

I know I probably shouldn't see this as a bad thing, but since I started bartending, I have encounteed a ridiculous amount of people who think I'm WAY younger than I am. The most common age they guess? 17. Seriously? I mean, I can agree with the fact that maybe I don't look like I'm about to turn 25, but I really don't think I look the same as I did when I was 17 for Pete's sake! I think people must just equate being little with being young. The conversation usually comes up when someone offers to buy me a drink because at least one person in the bar doesn't think I'm old enough to drink. And if it's not that, then it comes up when they ask what else I do. If I tell them I just graduated college, most of them freak out. Then I tell them I got my Master's degree, and they just about fall over dead. In all honesty, it kind of cracks me up. For some reason, my real age is just a shocker, I guess! Anyway, I included two pictures (one from when I was 17, and one from a few weeks ago). Yeah, I still look similar, but I think there are some differences. Maybe that's just what I'm trying to tell myself in hopes that I look at least a little more mature these days... Judge for yourself! :)

Bad Girls

Last night, me, Erin, and Jill watched the movie "Law Abiding Citizen" after having a delicious meal prepared by Erin herself. I had heard good things about the movie, but I do have to comment on the fact that it was waaaaaay more violent than I expected! It was pretty good, and I loved how it ended, but half the time, I was doing the whole peeking-through-with-one-eyeball thing because I didn't like what I was seeing. Eek! After that intensity, it seemed only right to catch up on some mindless TV shows by watching this week's episodes of the Real World and Bad Girls Club. In past years, I have been a major fan of Bad Girls Club (although I'm not proud to admit it). If you're unfamiliar with the show, here's the premise: A bunch of self-proclaimed "bad girls" move into a house together, and basically all they do is get tanked, have sex with randos, and fight with each other over the most p.o.i.n.t.l.e.s.s. things. Sounds really worth your time, right? Well, as Erin and I watched it last night, I couldn't help but feel pathetic for wasting about 40 valuable minutes of my life by watching the show. I guess in a way it makes me feel better about my own life, but damn. These girls are trashy and they are MEAN. Maybe that's the point since they're supposed bad girls, but seriously. I would not want people to see me in the light that I see them! Not gonna lie, I'll probably continue to watch it because it's cheap entertainment (if you can even call it entertainment), but I'm definitely not as excited about it as I used to be. Perhaps it's because I'm not cuddling up on the couch with my old roomie Steph anxiously waiting for the new episode, but somehow, it is starting to lose its effect. Thank God.

Sleep...I Need Sleep.

I don't know what it has been over the past few days, but I can't seem to sleep like a normal person lately. It's like a never-ending cycle. I can't fall asleep until really late, but somehow I still manage to wake up at the crack of dawn. Then I'm exhausted, so I want to take a nap. So, I nap, and then I can't sleep at night. Thus, the cycle continues. In all honesty, I want nothing more than a nap at this VERY moment, but I'm resisting the urge. It's taking everything in me, I swear! On a happy note, in a couple hours, I will be heading to Wausau to spend time with two of my besties (Erin and Jill). It's dinner and a movie night, so I'm really excited! Last week, Erin and I went to Jill's new apartment, so maybe this will become a regular occurrence since we're all close to each other now! Sad thing is, my parent's house is too freakishly disastrous (in big part because of all my crap laying around), so I can't/don't really want to invite them here! Perhaps that'll change soon... Anyway, because my mind keeps wandering back to the "I Need Sleep...ZZZZZ" mentality, I think I might actually try to sneak in a cat nap so I don't fall asleep on my drive over to Erin's. So much for this entry having any valid content worth reading... Lights out! ;)

Quotables

So... Since I mentioned in my last post that Quotable cards are one of my current addictions (and they have been for awhile), I thought I'd post some of my favorites. I have this vision in my head of what I want to do with these. Whenever I move somewhere, I want to put a bunch of these together to create a collage, kind of like a poster or something. They're slightly expensive, and I shouldn't spend money on buying all the ones I want, but for now, I will just dream about what it'll look like if and when I ever get the chance to do it!

My Current Addictions...

Here are some things I am currently addicted to:
(In no particular order...)

1. Lifetime Channel
2. Knock Knock products (In case you didn't catch on from all of my posts, I am a list-making freak. These products feed my addiction.)
3. Minesweeper
4. Anything and everything related to football season
5. Listening to Justin Bieber and my new Mumford & Sons CD
6. Dresses (especially ones with pockets)
7. Laughing Cow cheese with pretzels
8. Facebook
9. My camera (...and my phone...and my computer...)
10. All things Quotable
11. Sweatpants
12. Adding change to my sweet-ass piggy bank
13. Bejeweled
14. ModCloth Indie & Vintage Clothing
15. Law and Order: SVU re-runs
16. Stackable totes (They have saved my life...)
17. Mini cans of soda

I will probably continually be adding to this list. I always mannage to find new addictions and obsessions. :)

Things I Hate!

Often times, I get made fun of because I have a rather extensive list of things that I hate, that annoy me, or that scare me. So… Since so many people are aware of these things and like to point them out to me, I figured I might as well start a running list. :)

• I hate ketchup more than anything in the world.
• A few words (and some non-words) that will surely get me fired up are: funner, grosser, worser, and any attempts to use the word more before a word that ends in –er (i.e., more better).
• Songs I could stand not to hear again: “All I Wanna Do” by Sugarland; “Big Green Tractor” by Jason Aldean; and “Kryptonite” by 3 Doors Down.
• I get annoyed when people don’t clear off extra seconds they don’t use on the microwave. Not only does it keep me from seeing what time it is, but it also forces me to clear the timer before using the microwave again. Grrr!
• What’s with the phrase “new and improved?” If something’s new, how on earth can it be improved?
• I have a hard time when people say that God didn’t answer their prayers. They usually say that when they don’t get what they wanted, so my thought on that is that it’s not that he didn’t answer; it just means he said no. There’s a big difference.
• My body has a weird physical reaction to people biting into their gloves. Just thinking about it hurts my teeth!
• I hate chiropractors, although I’ve never been to one!
• I think lymph nodes are absolutely disgusting, and if I didn’t need them to live, I’d have them surgically removed.
• The sound of Styrofoam coming out of a tightly packed box causes physical pain in my ears. I don't think there's anything worse!

A rather random list, wouldn't ya say?! ;)

Time With The Babes!

If there's one thing I can be truly happy about right now, it's the fact that being in Colby gives me many more opportunities to spend time with my awesome nieces and nephews (and the rest of my family)! It seems like every time I see them, something else has changed, so I'm glad I can be around them as much as possible. In spending time with the kids the other day, here are a few things I learned that I didn't realize before:

1. Painting pictures at the kitchen table is still fun.
2. Taking the kids for ice cream is enjoyable because I get some too!
3. They're still afraid I'll move far away...forever... :(
4. Dolls for kids have gotten scarier looking (see image below).
4. Peyton (10) AND Lia (7) know how to text message, and they do it!
5. Austyn (5) can write, and it actually looks good!
6. Tayt will jump off pretty much a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g.
7. Nash is a fatty. Oh wait, I already knew that...
8. I cannot wait for the new baby to arrive!!!!!!!!!

(Austyn's creepy doll)

What.A.Weekend.

So, this weekend has proven to be an interesting one. I had to work Friday night, and all would have been right in the world had I not felt like absolute CRAP the entire time I was working. At first on Friday, I woke up all stuffy and sneezy, thinking I was suffering from allergies and/or a cold, but by the time I got to work, that had subsided and a new, painful feeling developed in my belly. Not really gut rut, not really an "I have to puke" feeling, not really anything I've felt before. I hadn't eaten all day, so I assumed that was the problem. Wrong. I tried to eat after work and it almost had an opposite effect. I felt worse. People tried to feed me beer thinking somehow that would be the magical solution. Again, wrong. So, I went to bed hoping it'd go away, but I woke up on Saturday feeling just as icky. I gobbled down some toast and some chicken noodle soup, all to no avail. I was frustrated because all I wanted to do was lay in bed, but I couldn't because I had to work again. Normally my mom could've probably covered for me, but she had catering to do, so I was pretty much left without an option. Once I got to work, I started feeling better, and for the rest of the night, I felt pretty good. Wahoo! Too bad I woke up today feeling like death again. Seriously, I don't know what's going on with this little body of mine, but it hasn't been good these past few days! :( It's slowly getting better, at least enough to allow me to get one more job application out today....

....That brings me to two other things. First of all, last night, a bunch of people I know came up to Allison's while I was bartending, my brother Jake being one of them. I was telling him how I had been making pretty good money that night, and he said, "Don't fall into the trap, Nae." By that, he meant that there are a ton of people who start bartending for extra money but then just settle doing that for the rest of their lives because it's too good of money to quit. Believe me, I did NOT expect to be doing what I'm doing right now, and I do NOT intend to do it forever. But... At the same time, I am in desperate need of money, and until I find a damn school that finds me worth hiring, I'm not really sure what else I can be doing! On a positive note, I pulled in about $150 last night for 9 hours (aka: approximately $17/hr.), so I'll take it for now!

The second thing I am referring to is a short conversation I had with my dad today. I was sitting in my room working on my job application, and he assumed I was just dinking around. I told him what I was doing, so naturally he asked where I was applying. This particular application was for an Academic Adviser position at Portland State University. So, my dad said, "That's pretty far away. Is it right in Portland?" I said yes, and then he proceeded to tell me some negative things about the city (i.e., high cost of living, lots of rain, etc.). I get what he was saying, but I wanted to be like, "Well, do you not want me to apply to anything or what?!" There will be pros and cons to ANY place I apply, even for positions in Wisconsin, so at this point, I'm looking at jobs I'm interested in and that I think I'd be good at, and I'm applying away. How else am I going to get a job?!

Well, as usual, this is super long. Despite the crazy ranting, my weekend wasn't the worst I've ever had. Just a bit tiring with being sick and spending most of my time working. I feel good about sending out that application, and hopefully I can continue the momentum tomorrow and the rest of the week. Until then, it's bedtime for this cat. Peace out, cub scouts. :)

Little Brown Jug

So... I'm a little behind on posting this, but last weekend, I went to Minocqua with my mom and some of her friends. Man, did we have a blast! My aunt and uncle have a cabin up there, so since they were out in N.Y., we decided to invade their territory for the weekend! The first place we stopped? This little hole-in-the-wall bar called the Little Brown Jug. I've heard many stories about this place, but up until last weekend, I had never experienced its glory. We all put money into a kitty, and one of the the first things we were talked into buying was an Agwa Bomb. Just the name freaked me out, but the description was even crazier. There was talk of some ingredient being flown in from Bolivia and then transported to Canada before it even makes it the U.S. I mean, this drink literally sounded illegal. Coincidentally, the famous LBJ is the top seller in the whole country of this alcohol. I wonder why... Perhaps because everyone sees the sign and says, "Hmm, what is that?" and upon hearing the description, they're so curious that they just haaaaaave to try it. That's what happened to us! So, 6 bombs and $30 later, we all got a taste of the Agwa Bomb. Wasn't as terrible as I'd feared, although some man told us that pretty soon we'd be seeing a little fairy on our shoulders. Again, sounds illegal. I'm not sure if the bombs were to blame for the craziness that ensued (see the pictures below), but I'm sure they didn't help the situation. Thankfully, we made it back to the cabin safely and lived to tell the stories of the weekend. Can't wait to go back! :)

The Name

Well folks, it's official. After becoming addicted to the blogs of my sister-in-law (here) and future sister-in-law (here), I have decided to start my own. I'm sure my posts will be FAR less exciting since I'm not married with a million children or planning a dream wedding, but maybe someone will find it worth the read. :)

I tried and tried and triiiiiiiiied to enter names for this blog, but unfortunately, everyone else seems to have the same title ideas as me! Damn. I finally succeeded with "High Hopes & Heartbreak." It's the name of a song, but that's not the reason I chose it. I thought the name was fitting because it pretty much sums up where I'm at in my life right now. This whole graduating from college (for the second time) and searching for a job thing has proven to be quite the emotional rollercoaster. Some days are up, some are down, hence the high hopes and heartbreak. I've come so close to getting a job on multiple occasions, but as my high school history teacher told me, "Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades." He was so right. I mean, it's great to get interviews and to know that people think you're capable of doing a job well, but when you don't get hired, it starts to make you question yourself and what you're doing wrong. I'm constantly reminded that not getting the job doesn't mean I'm not qualified or that I didn't interview well, but even if that's true, it's not that encouraging sometimes. Over the past few months, I've heard just about everything from everyone, whether they're asking a question or giving advice. Here are some things I could stand to never hear again:

- "Did you find a job yet?" (Um, no, would I be here if I had one?)
- "The right job will come along eventually." (When, in 5 years?)
- "There IS a job out there for you..." (Yeah? Why don't I have one?)
- "What the heck is Student Affairs Administration?"
- "Have you tried looking at the Clinic for jobs?" (I still haven't figured out why people have made the connection between my degree and the clinic. It's a mystery...)
- "How many applications do you have out there?"
- "The economy is really rough right now." (Ya think?)
- "What will you do if you don't get a job before the school year starts?" (I. don't. know.)
- "EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON." (I seriously hear this one like every day. While I do believe it and appreciate people saying it to make me feel better, it doesn't make me feel better right now because I stillllllll don't have a job.)

I'm sure there are more things that drive me crazy, but this is enough for now! I feel like a whiney little brat right now, but it's hard not to be discouraged sometimes! And while I was kind of comical about hating the things people say, I do want to stress the fact that I'm VERY thankful for all the kind words and encouragement I have received from everyone. Keep crossing your fingers for me. The right job will come along eventually, right? ;)